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Last night, went with friends to see American Gangster – it was a good film, good acting, but in the end I felt it lacked drama as though they were simply retelling a true story, too true to be deemed entertainment. Coming home everyone was in the mood for a little bourbon, so we came to the LaLa and lit all the candles and poured some aged bourbon over crushed ice and I suggested a seance but J worried we’d call spirits in that we weren’t prepared to deal with so I read everyone’s Tarot cards instead.

Everyone seemed impressed by how meaningful the readings were so they turned it around on me and read my cards. 

I long ago learned to read via a system of interpretation and layout – I think the layout I use is called the celtic cross but it has been improvised on over years of reading. There is the card in the center and a card that is placed perpendicular to cover it – the center card is what the reading is all about and the card that covers is what informs that theme. Then in groups of three around this core are the top for career, right is relationship, bottom is environment/home, left is heart’s desire. Two extra cards are laid to the side at the beginning – one for major wish and the other a minor wish.

My reading turned out to be pretty meaningful as well. What was at the core was the three of cups – three women draped in robes who raise their goblets to the sky and stand on tip toes as if in mid-dance. Sound familiar? What covered this card was the King of Wands – also referred to as the Prince of the Chariot of Fire – the card is known to be “The Seeker” – it is an airy quality of fire, symbolic of smoke and expansion – the King of Wands indicates impulsive, intuitive, and highly creative character, symbolizing swiftness and strength in word and deed. Inherent in this personality are qualities of individuality, ambition, justice and straightforwardness…a warm and generous heart with a good sense of humor and possessing a natural and infectious optimism. The King of Wands tackles every aspect of life with enthusiasm and vigor, being friendly, gregarious and open in attitude with a healthy sense of personal value while remaining supportive and encouraging to others. This is a card of boundless energy and power. The King of Wands is aligned with actions taken on impulse and a character easily influenced by external circumstances. There is often an inherent violence in this individual’s desires to see the ideals of truth and creativity upheld. The King of Wands is fair and just but is deeply aware that true justice may not be found in this world. Therefore there is a tendency to look beyond for guidance and inspiration…thus becoming The Seeker. 

There you have it – my earlier conversations and realizations during this week are I am choosing emotionally unavailable people to be attracted to because then I don’t have to have a relationship at all – so while at the core of my reading is me, in mid-dance, celebrating my life (a minor digression: after our morning Thanksgiving drama where we had to sit on the floor and cry and tell everyone how this one hurt this one’s feelings and this one never understands, a few of us drove off and I cranked Valerie up on the truck stereo and right by the Fairgrounds – which was opening day by the way – we hopped out and began to dance like mad to Amy Winehouse singing her heart out and cars came by with folks dressed to the nines, driving into the horse races for opening day, and I recognized Steve’s ex boss and waved hi, and we kept dancing and L’s dogs were dancing with us – and I said, that was Steve’s old boss, and the other L made the comment “I guess he thinks Rachel is handling the aftermath pretty well” and we kept dancing and dancing till the song was over and when we got back in the truck, we all felt much better and ready to go put the turkey in – but, alas, I digress too much)…

Back to the reading – I have been saying I’m ready for love – but now I am wondering – my friends say I need to believe in a love that would not compromise Rachel and her new found fabulous life and I say hmm, do I think this is possible….so the question is is this King of Wands that person coming into my life? Or is it me being the boy and the girl in my own narrative – parenting myself, being a child, having fun, being loved, loving, and I’m complete as is?  

Met F and S to talk about the Turkish party. While we were waiting for S to arrive, F and I looked at her digital photo album and the house she is building in Rize near her mother’s tea plantation. When S arrived, we made our list pretty quickly and talked about the guest list and then started chatting away about F’s birthday party and how we are going to celebrate. A man walked over and introduced himself and asked us about the party we are planning – he seemed very interested but he left without any of us offering an invitation – so S was going to tell C, the owner, to tell him next time he was in. 

On Thanksgiving, someone told me “Rachel, you’re all curves and I have no brakes.” Pretty good pick up line, huh?


Here’s me protecting Fatma from the girls – they were singing “Girls Just Want to Have Fatma” since she is so Fatmalicious:

poca-protecting-fatma.avi

We were dancing and dancing and dancing and dancing after our meal, and into the night and into the next day………

Then we added some gymnastics:


  

And then took it outside for some bayou gymnastics:

 

Two deep fried turkeys, one brined and roasted turkey, three roasted chickens, shrimp and andouille stuffed mirliton, dressing with sausage and pecans, sweet potato souffle, Turkish dirty rice, sweet potatoes, chopped salad, gravy, eggplant, 

butternut squash soup, pecan pie, pumpkin cake, apple pie, crudite with poppy seed dressing, pumpkin cheesecake, brussel sprouts, green beans with caramelized mushrooms and shallots, wine, and more…..


We set the table up on the bayou and ate outside – although winter was upon us and it was pretty damn cold:

 

Thanksgiving morning got up and walked the dogs and ran a five mile race in City Park along with about 500 other people. What a great way to start the day – running with friends – and getting ready for the day of feasting. My timing was decent too considering I was trying to catch my breath most of the run and my piriformis on my left side got so tight I had to stop and try to stretch on one of the bridges. One of my neighbors was running by and shouted – “Don’t Jump!” – and everyone thought that was real funny – later I passed another neighbor who runs every morning – he said, “You’re killing me,” as I passed him and then he shouted, “You shoulda jumped.” 

The weather report says rain tomorrow – so what? I made enough stuffed mirliton to feed an army – a real army. And the pecan pie just came out of the oven. It’ll all be good – I just know it – and there will be lots of happy people eating lots of delicious food and drinking yummy champagne and wine. Not to mention the pumpkin cheesecake calling out to everyone in the fridge. 

I’ve been going to my mom’s apartment every day to take care of her since she broke her ribs earlier this week. She doesn’t know how she did it but because she has osteoporosis, she could sneeze and break them. She lives in the slums of Metairie and I’m always shocked to go to her apartment. It reminds me of that song that Diana Ross used to sing about a mother who died in the projects, who the singer was ashamed of. I’m not ashamed of my mother, everyone makes choices in life. I’ve offered her to come live with me many times. Steve and I offered to put her in a condo many times in the past but it always had a stipulation that it was a condo for her, not a place for her to invite my sister to come live in. She couldn’t accept that as a condition, so it never happened. 

She lives in a four-plex between Veterans and the I-10, an area that used to be peppered with young families but where most buildings went Section 8 ten years ago when that was the vogue thing to do – buy and convert small multiunit buildings into Section 8, a sure thing for landlords – after Katrina, it is just the slums. 

About twice a year,  my mother finds someone to plant flowers in all the pots she has outside her door and down her stairs, so sometimes the plants assuage the insult of the trash strewn around. But most times they are barren and only add to the sense of despair that colors the building.Inside the apartment is a dark, crowded smokey space. Her furniture is back from a time when she had more space and more luxurious digs. However, the hoarding of magazines and newspapers and groceries have escalated the feeling that there is no air space between the smoke and the wood. Her bedroom sports a large king-sized bed with a dark canopy on high pillars that adds to the sense that these furnishings were intended for larger and brighter spaces.

I took Jake with me there on Monday to take the brace off of her that I had put on Sunday. He stood by the foot of the bed staring at her with curiosity and then asked her if she had been on a motorcycle because his Poppy had broken his ribs when he crashed his motorcycle in the Smokey Mountains.

Last night, I brought her medicated patches a nurse friend had given me to isolate and control the pain. Loca came with me. She sidled her sleek black body up to the side of the bed and sheepishly asked to be petted. 

The lyrics to Diana Ross’s song in no way apply to my mom – she lived a life of luxury in hotel suites to homes when married to my dad until he died in 1985. She then lived in my brother’s condominium for a decade where she worked and could have saved money for her retirement. She then worked up until this year – again having the ability to save for her future. When she bemoans that she is going to be a bag lady  I tell her she’ll be the only one on the street in Gucci shoes.  But for some reason, that song always plays through my head when I get out of the truck.

I was thinking about the prayer that would lead off our Thanksgiving meal tomorrow and I thought what was appropriate to lead off with is this enormous bounty that we all have and how we are given so much so that we can give back at equal measure. Again, as if reading my mind, my daily affirmation today:

November 21, 2007

I give from the wellspring of my good! I give generously and gratefully!

A routine of Arlene resistance and Loca motion has begun in earnest. Each morning, I’m dragging the almost dead weight of Arlene who refuses to do her morning walk – but I make her. And I’m keeping Loca from dragging us down the street. Since I’ve been crabby lately due to illness and work overload not to mention upcoming social engagements that are taking place at my house very soon, their routine has not been amusing. At least not to me. 

I was walking along the lagoon in the park in the moist thick air – it’s supposed to rain today – and thinking about the Thanksgiving dinner here and then thinking about the Turkish party next week (another small event that seems to have expanded virally) – and I thought I need to overcome this exhaustion and perk up and get ready to roll. Forget about who is coming or not coming and just get on board. This was my horoscope this morning:

Taurus