Walk on by
Headed to Swirl last night much to my stomach’s chagrin but wanted to catch up with F and B before they left for Turkey and D who was headed back to El Lay and see G who I hadn’t seen in a while, but of course, the first person I do see coming out of the store is the one person I’m in high avoidance of and of course, there’s the every time I think I’m out, they pull me back in tug of war that begins to stoke up inside me – but, I take a breath, I’ve purged so much that I notice instead the discomfort is outside of me and I’m clear and resolute in my purpose and stride. I feel good in the words of James Brown – like I knew that I would. I’m the prize, I tell myself when I walk on by after cordial and nervous greetings and into the store, and I know with absolute certainty the only person going to rattle my cage is the one who recognizes I’m IT and is available emotionally, physically, psychic-ly, lovingly, mentally, soulfully, religiously, spiritually.